kiyoothong, I used to have a few guys make comments that they thought I was gay back in the early '90s. I was laying out with Maria and you could not overlook her if you liked beautiful women. Yet they couldn't comprehend that I could wear a thong and like women. Puzzling, isn't it?

I guess I'm more approachable when I'm in a thong. Or maybe girls don't see me as a threat. I remember one time I was on the beach and this girl came up to me and asked if I could watch her stuff while she was gone to the washroom. There were other guys there and they were closer to her than I was. She bypassed all of those guys and came to me instead. I felt a bit flattered.

I was just thinking about this earlier today! I was thinking about how lucky women are to be able to sport a thong, and no one really bats an eye. However, people tend to make a bigger deal about a man in one. I really wish the double standard didn’t exist. I’m really hoping to take a day off from work, Monday, so I can go thonging at my local lake.

It is easy for men to say there is a double standard, and there is.....

However as a guy it is easy to be insensitive to the incredible amount of marketing and media that pushes women to look a certain way, and to think they are forever being judged on their appearance and cloths.

Women are terribly insecure about their bums, having been exposed to the perfect bodies fifteen-year-olds in photo-shopped adds for products to shave their legs or wash their bodies. Open any women's mag and almost every page you will find some portion of a semi-naked, perfect female form, and advertisements for products which will cure and cover. Which leaves most women over 22 embarrassed about their less than Kardashian bodies.

ou only need to look at the number of products in their makeup draw, or on the bathroom shelves, to see how successful the "your natural self is not perfect and needs this" marketing has become.

Our message board is full of stories by men who have difficulty encouraging reluctant women to have enough self-confidence to bare their bums in a thong. Once encourage into a thong they still fear the catty looks and comments from other women, which can be just as terrifying as men find the homophobic comments of teenage boys.

Both men and women need encouragement and reinforcement, delivered in a nonsexual way. A thumbs up and a smile, from a distance, is all it takes to send the message that you approve.

Women might get more of a pass, but it is not easy for them either. So life ain't fair. Blonds have more fun. Skinny girls get invited to more parties. Rich men get more young hot women. You are not going to change the status quo without upsetting some old prudes. Just have the courage to go out and publicly wear your thong, and support others who do too.

Life is not fair. You get old. It is rather likely that you will not look as good in a thong 20, 10 or even 5 years from now.  So now is the time to be bold. Lead the way and others will follow. 

Sometimes people ask me if I ever get annoyed when someone makes a rude or homophobic remark. Many years ago I did. Now I have more self confidence, or thicker skin, and actually prefer they waist their breath on me, rather than annoy someone who might be more sensitive.

When you are a social pioneer you must expect some push back. Even Elvis and the Beetles got negative blow-back. This is the price one pays for being in the vanguard, but it makes it easier for others who come on behind. 

Over the years people like myself, and many others, have made Fort Lauderdale a more tolerant place, even though we are invaded by many red-necks and tourists from more conservative states. Several people have told me that seeing me out in public in a thong did not make them want to wear one, but did make them want to live in a place where you could wear one, and as a result they moved here. 

It does not take many people to change the tone of a conversation. Yes women in things get less grief from the homophobic. Then again, women in thongs get hit on by men far more. It is still a low level form of harassment, just in a different form. 

So put on your thong. Go to the beach, and if you want the glory and protection of women invite them to join you for the day. 

JM, that is a great post, reflecting a deep and mature perspective. Thanks for your contributions and moderating this board.

JM I think you are too readily overlooking the peer pressure and body shaming that men, especially young men, face. Additionally, there was a time in the 60s & 70s when there was a lot more latitude for mens clothing in general--which included swimwear. It was ok to "do your own thing". Just look at the men in commercials or on popular TV series or actors. In many cases they've got washboard abs and built up pecs, square-cut jaws with a "bad boy" several days growth of beard. Or they're the artist/musician type with funky glasses (whether they need them or not) and a man bun or long hair. I'm glad I'm not a adolescent young man today who is trying to find his identity. It may not be the same pressure that women face, or marketed the same, but I think there is a lot of pressure on men for a "certain look" and to fall in line.

There is a double standard, but both male and female face body-shaming. Sometimes directly and often/mostly by media presentation. Many females are fearful that their bodies are not perfect and it can be a revelation that when they see other females on beaches, they realise that they are not alone with flabby bits and cellulite etc. The most liberating thing for many is that others are not perfect honed and toned and that they are enjoying themselves anyway.

And for boys, the felt need to be muscular too soon leads to steroid use/abuse.

Through years of my experiences certain gals react towards me with that, “tsk” murmur once recognized. Finding my clothes are feminine. Spandex short shorts, racerback tank top, leggings, thong swimwear, tight jeans. Gals want to box their ideology he appears gross and wrong in wearing as a male.